Ellie Messinger-Adams, APCC

Trauma, Teen and Betrayal Specialist

Are you looking for a therapist because your world has just been turned completely upside down? Do you feel stuck with nowhere to turn? Are you filled with panic, shock and disbelief that this is actually your life?

Are you overwhelmed by your daily existence? Or are you struggling with the impact of trauma? Has betrayal or infidelity affected your life? Are you full of shame and guilt from your role in these crises?  Are you stuck wondering “is this actually my life”?

Many individuals and couples have found themselves in your shoes, reeling from the crisis of betrayal and other traumas. And as a result, your teens and children have begun to act out, become too quiet or are arguing too much, show signs of depression or anxiety.

As parents, we know that when parents are struggling, their children can also struggle. 

Parents and children alike have asked themselves the following questions:

CAN I HEAL FROM THIS EXPERIENCE?

WILL I BE ABLE TO FIND “NORMAL” AGAIN?

WILL I FEEL SHAME FOREVER?

CAN I LEARN TO TRUST AGAIN?

DO I HAVE WHAT IT TAKES TO BE WHOLE AGAIN?

This is such a painful, lonely, devastating place to be.

If this is you, there is healing that can happen. 

My name is Ellie. I am passionate about helping people get unstuck so that they can begin moving forward. I help teens and adults who have been impacted by trauma, betrayal wounds, and other life altering experiences. I help them repair their relationships and heal themselves. 

In this work I support these individuals through their life transitions, stressors and traumas. With a focus on relational counseling, I work together with my clients and students to help them find the inner strength and power they need to get unstuck and start moving forward.

After working with individuals, teens and couples who were feeling stuck, struggling with life altering trauma, communication issues, or the heartbreak of betrayal, I know what stuck looks like, and, more importantly, I know what the journey to getting unstuck looks like. 

BETRAYAL AND INFIDELITY

Betrayal trauma is such a specific wound it requires a therapist with a specialized treatment approach and experience.  In our work together we’ll develop a clear idea of what a healthy relationship with yourself and your significant other might look like and focus on the changes needed to get there. 

I can guide you through the healing process necessary to repair your relationship or provide the support you will need to end the relationship as gracefully as possible. We will go at your pace, in a collaborative treatment relationship, and explore what your real wants and needs for your life are.

We will work to transform how you communicate so that you can feel more heard, seen and most importantly, understood. Our work together will help you heal.

TEEN Counseling

During this pandemic and in the light of the constant racial/cultural tragedies and inequities, our children are experiencing trauma in more ways than ever before. They feel alone and anxious as they wonder what will become of their lives. 

As a specialist in teen trauma, I know that the key to helping teens heal and grow through these traumas is recognizing the uniqueness of their experiences while helping them to see that they are not alone. There is no one size fits all to this work, supporting teens is about helping them develop their personal self-awareness and resiliency. In working with your teen I will work with them to identify the core of their distress. Together we will discover what it means for them to feel healthy and whole again. 

NEW PARENTS

We all come into parenting in our own unique ways. For some it comes easily, but for many others there can be unexpected twists and turns along the way. Things may not be as you expected them to be and you may feel betrayed by your expectations and the expectations of those around you. In addition to joy and renewal becoming a parent can bring feelings of grief, sadness, fear, and unraveling. If your journey was not a straight and narrow path you may feel alone in your pain. 

As a woman and mother I help my clients to pick up the pieces and discover the powerful parent that you are inside. It can be difficult to let go of what you expected parenthood to be. By offering encouragement, guidance and understanding, I will help you learn to be the parent you know you can be. I will provide encouragement for you as you process the journey to motherhood, an ear to listen when you feel overwhelmed, and be your guide as you purposefully grow into parenthood.

Here’s what you’ll get when you work with me

I will take the time to get to know your struggles, and what your desires are for moving forward.  I will recognize and honor you as the expert of your life.  I will guide you in learning your strengths.  I will help you make healthy changes to the parts of your life that cause distress and pain.

You ARE ready to take the first step.  I will guide you the rest of the way.  Schedule your free 20-minute consultation today!

Ellie Messinger-Adams, APCC, PPS - SC

• Associate Professional Clinical Counselor #3999

• Pupil Personnel Services Credential

• MA in Counselor Education

EXPERIENCE

• Counselor - Palo Alto School District

• John F. Kennedy University Community Counseling Center

• CALPCC Santa Clara County Regional Coordinator

• Adolescent Peer Mentor

• Career Consultant

• Professional Figure Skating Coach

• Suicide and Risk Prevention Training

• Mindfulness-Based Interventions to Rewire the Brain

• Building Resiliency During COVID19: Self-Care and Vicarious Trauma Prevention

• Perinatal Mood Disorders Components of Care Training

• Advanced Perinatal Mental Health Psychotherapy Training

AREAS OF INTEREST

• Healing after Trauma

• Teens Struggling to Succeed

• Couples Deciding to Have Children

• Pregnancy, Prenatal, Postpartum

• Infidelity/Betrayal Trauma

• Couples Communication Issues

• Relationship Stress

• New Parent Stress

• Parenting Support

• Body Image and Self-Esteem Struggles

• Eating Disorders

• LGBTQ, Gender, and Sexuality Concerns

• Life Transitions: Job Loss, Relationship Change, Moving, etc 

• Religion / Spirituality Concerns

*Supervised by Jeni Woodfin, LMFT #107447